“How do you stop rambling?

I was asked that question today in class by a man that is known as a classic rambler. I didn’t give him an answer. Instead, I asked him some questions seemingly unrelated to the matter and then read a story to him. He likes the short essay tales that I write, and it seemed a good way to conclude our time together this morning.

Rambling conversations are wearisome. I know that because I’m frequently guilty of causing them. In truth, they aren’t typically conversations; they’re monologues. Actually patient listeners will stay eyes-on the talker all the way through, but the semi-patient (like me) will “listen” while “multi-tasking.” It’s too similar to reading a Stephen King novel in which his unnecessary attention to nitty-gritty detail for mundane matters makes my eyes and mind glaze over, and I begin skimming over paragraphs to return to real dialogue or action.

The more self-aware I become of my tendencies to rambling, the more intentional I attempt to be at getting to the point. I definitely have a mixed record on this, but I think I’m making positive progress. I ask myself if my listener really needs to know every scrap of detail, or if he or she just needs the bottom line? On the other hand, do I have a need to express more than just the bottom line? If so, can I find another way to do that? Do I have to do it in conversation? Can I write it instead?

I can certainly put it in a blog that virtually no one reads. Spill my thoughts here, get them out of my head, leave them on the electronic page, declutter my brain, and free up my emotions for healthier employments. Perhaps then, with a clear head and mind, I can speak concisely and to the point, ramble-free, and find a way to help my student learn to do the same.